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Sample Writing

10/1/10 


We've started writing memoirs, a recent item first: the WSU Writing Mentor visit. 

 

Read the examples below.  Do you find:

 

  • details (5Ws),
  • descriptions (sights/sounds),
  • examples (anecdote/explanation),
  • strong verbs (action),
  • thoughts,
  • emotion,
  • dialogue?

Examples so far -- what else can YOU write with such detail and description:


Description:


"So we start our rides. Billy has a four-wheeler that sounds like a RC car. I have a KTM 550 that sounds like a lion growling at its worst enemy, and that's when I'm not pulling on the gas, when I pull on the gas it sounds like a monster truck getting ready to do their run on the track."


Action, Description, Detail, Dialogue, Humor:


We walked outside and my dad had a lime green dirt bike strapped down in the back of his silver Ford pickup. We got it down, started it up, and Sammy jumped on her two stroke bright green Kawasaki four wheeler. Up the hill we went. Sammy started rolling backwards so she was facing Bubba. Sammy laughs and yelled, "What's up?"

"Haha -- WATCH OUT SAMMY!" 

BANG! right into a parked truck.

"Oh my gosh!

"It's okay. I'm fine."

"I'm not worried about you. Is the bike okay?" 






Sekin:  “It  was not a good day; the clouds were grey, and the grass was wet, and the breeze of the wind made me cold. When we went to the lunch room, it was like an argument; it was loud.”

 

Dragan:  “I was thinking at that moment what are they like? are they nice? mean?” and “After that it was awkward because i was thinking to myself "what do i say!" and then she just started talking about writing...”

 

Nita: “It was conversations, talking, massing around all at once.” and “I hear my name as they assigned my mentor to me. My mentor raises her hand.”

 

Naner: “Ms.Edwards stands short but is like the boss; she says about twelve names, and then shocking death "Ooh no" I say to myself.”

 

Stenda: “The weather was windy; then again there were no clouds, the sky was blue, non-cloudy, yet it wasn't raining...”

 

Tish: “On this day the clouds were grey and they had little gaps in them, you could see the beautiful sky. It was almost as beautiful as the great lakes!”

 

Kimy: “When I  looked up at the sky it looked sunny and partly cloudy, and it sounded like wind, and the wind sounded like whistling...”

 

Tiger: I wasn’t there but... they played a game when people tried to get in on the circle of people...

 

Elbe: “We were all inside this little room that was about as big as a little gymnasium. I could hear everyone talking while I was listening to my friends. ‘Who are those college kids?’”

 

Jamon: The multi-purpose room was roaring with...

 

Lamjo: “The games we played were fun; they were 'Tag Games’ and ‘Sorting Games.'”

 

Enmo: “It was September 23 when the WSU mentors came”

 

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